Pieces of Me, Volume VI

Click here to view Pieces of Me, Vol III

It's funny how listing 25 things about yourself each week is daunting and sometimes downright hard! I have to look back at my previous posts to make sure I don't repeat myself *so sad* cuz I'd like to think there are a million and one things I could share about myself instead of a measly 75. So...here goes.

76. I have a serious temper. Whenever I'm in an argument I usually walk away (I can actually see myself doing bodily harm to folk) because if I don't I'll be standing beside Mike Vick talkin' bout some "I have found Jesus...for now." right before my sentencing. Yea he said that dumb shyt.

77. I try to make peace not war. (look @ #76 to know why) hmpf.

78. I am an aggressive driver. I'm sorry I can't help it. When I get behind the wheel I'm ready to zoom NOT lolligag behind somebody who actually doin the dayum speed limit. Can you move yo ass over? Dayum! All up in my way.

79. I don't think Dave Chapelle is all that funny. I can actually do without him.

80. Jackie Warner from that show WorkOut (comes on BRAVO channel) is hot I don't care what nobody say.

81. I am a sex.ual devi.ant becuz this shyt intrigues me. Hand signals? Foot tapping? So there's a whole culture of "stall" sex? In a dirty ass bathroom? (I mean I know women's bathrooms are horrid and I assume the men's bathroom is too. Maybe not. *shrug*) Are you kidding me? I want to find out everything about it. Men keep ya feet planted and don'tchu dare reach down and try to pick up nothing! *sigh* LOL!

82. I don't have a problem with white people. I had plenty of white friends growing up. My family never talked about race, still don't.

83. I can not stomach the smell of hamburger cooking. Straight gagging!

84. I recently started shaving my legs. Recently as in five years ago. I'm 33.

85. I'm extremely quiet in a room full of strangers. I am not outgoing. I don't like small talk. I like to people watch and then go home.

86. I'm no good at "networking". (see #85)

87. I am not a phone person altho I will text and email the hell outta you.

88. I have had six different cars. Ford, Honda, Toyota, Jeep, VW and Hyundai.

89. I have written and published three novels.

90. I can not stand folk who gotta be the center of attention. Chill.

91. I would love to live in Houston. Don't ask me why. I've never even visited there. *mute*

92. What is the hype about NY? It's dirty and crowded and the people are overly aggressive. (Sorry fellow NYers) I'm just saying.

93. When I'm at home I weigh myself every time I pee. (hold up have I said this before??) I have the scale that calculates body fat and % water. Complete craziness.

94. When Jesus said to tithe 10%, I don't think that means financially and that's it. I think it's a combination of money and time (volunteering in the church). Just my two cents.

95. I am attracted/addicted to dark men with facial hair. Highlights (yellow men) need not apply. Ugh.

96. I get bored easily.

97. I see myself skinny *lol*. No, I'm serious.

98. I sometimes wish bad things on people but I quickly be like "I'm just playin Lord!" Cuz if something were to happen, I'd freak.

99. I am moody.

100. I'm ok with going to the movies, restaurant or anywhere else alone.

Did I just pull that out my azz or what? Geesh! Everybody have a happy, safe, blessed holiday weekend!

Durty

Where They At?

Hey people! What it do? I tried not to seem pressed about this and hold it and not blog until Monday morning. What-ev! We in a crisis ya'll!

So I went to my hometown this weekend and I hooked up with my homegirl. The heat index was about 106 so we decided we'd see what VA Beach was doing. It wasn't doing NOTHING. Nothing y'all. In 91-92, we shut that shyt down every weekend, all times of the night meeting, greeting and grinning. Me and her. My momma's tan Chevette. My pockets deep from waitressing at my momma's spot. Her keeping the time to make sure we made curfew. Me not caring cuz I wasn't the one with the curfew. Her caring too much cuz her ass was on the line. She is the ying to my yang. Fun times. Fun times.

We walked the strip. We walked the boardwalk. There were several mini concerts going on, a lot of folk milling around. With all that freaking walking and looking, we came to the same dayum conclusion.

We.did.not.see.any.handsome/attractive/cute.men.our.age!!! (30's)

Not a one! There were some "could be cute" ones but they were bunned up. Ugh. And you best believe those women were holding on to their arms, making their presence felt. I was rolling my eyes all freaking night cuz it was unnecessary. It was too dayum hot to be all up on folk staking your claim and shyt. It really ain't that serious! *blown*

Boo with the potbelly pushing a stroller. Not cute. U might as well of kept yo eyes straight ahead, you lookin at us becuz???
Boo with the thug-luv attire (wife beata, baggy jeans, sex in the eyes, beer on the breath). I can't and I won't.
Boo that was young enough to be my seed telling me he could handle all this. Wow.
Boo that couldda been our daddy looking at us like we were a 2-piece spicy. The nerve.

Serious crisis.

We weren't out there trying to get some burn (I'm spoken for) we just wanted something nice to look at. Something to say dayummmmmmmm about. My stock in men is at an all time low and this weekend ain't do shyt to change my mind.

Where all the good lookin brothas at? Can anybody tell me where the good lookin folk hang out?

Holla.

Durty.

Pieces of Me, Volume III

Click here to view Pieces of Me, Vol I

Click here to view Pieces of Me, Vol II

I thought it would be relatively easy to list things about myself but now that I'm at #51 I feel like I'm grabbing at straws. I mean am I really this boring? I thought I was some complex, forward thinking, non-conformed, beautiful, intelligent, can't.be.moved, black woman! *sigh* Yea ok, obviously I think way too highly of myself..

51. I.am.the.shyt. *lol* I do not suffer from self loathing or low self esteem. Nope. I know who I am and WHOSE I am. Stop playing.

52. I am passionate. I ooze passion. I breathe it. I AM it.

53. I love love. Character flaw? Perhaps but it doesn't stop me from loving hard. That's the only way I know how. For God so loved the world.. need I say more?

54. I am terrified of buying stocks/having a portfolio/mutual funds. The jargon intimidates me. Yields? No load fee? *scratching my head* But I promise I will cross this bridge real soon.

55. I am competitive but only with certain folk. I hate when Stunna beats my ass in chess and tennis. When he wins, I see red. I wanna fight. He's a competitor too ya see. Not.good.

56. I have penis envy. I want one.

57. I steal parking passes from work because I refuse to pay $13 to park somewhere I don't really want to be. What-eva!

58. Ok it's not like I don't want to be at work because honestly I do no work, it's just that an idle mind...yea you finish that and it's probably the main reason I fantasize bout married men. Becuz I ain't got shyt else to do between 8:30-3:45. (don't hate at my work hours).

59. I feel bad for Juanita Bynum. It ain't no joke when the ones you feel closest to you wanna hurt and destroy you!

60. I want a pet but I'm sure Mike Vick done effed that up for err'body! *bastid* There's gonna be a dog-buyin freeze *lol* watch what I tell you!

61. Tragedies are my wake-up call, my ah-ha moment. Someone close to my son was killed in a motorcycle accident. It rattles me when death comes so early and so violent. He was 24.

62. I miss my sister. I miss Sterling. I miss Tyler. I miss Tim.

63. I can not stop eating those vanilla wafer things. You know the ones that look like "x'd" cardboard and are filled with sweet vanilla stuff and a million come in one pack? When you bite into it, crumbs fly everywhere. I'm sure the ants in my house are having a field day. *ugh* They are the dumbest food ever but they sure are good.

64. I got a B-12 shot yesterday. *shew* I feel my metabolism shuckin and jivin as we speak! I'm ready to get up and do something! *energized*

65. I hate cleaning bathrooms and kitchens. I will put it off as long as possible. Maybe it is a good thing that I live alone?? Be glad for the small things. LOL! Nothing worse than somebody breathing down ya neck wondering why you not cleaning. Ugh!

66. I want to take a cooking/baking class but I don't want to eat what I cook. Too much temptation in the world! Carbs are the anti-Christ!

67. I am piercing my nose to go with my whole new bohemian thing I told you about last time.

68. I am obsessed with Bird from Soul Food. She has the prettiest skin and hair! I want to be her! I AM her!

69. As I get older, I *secretly* wouldn't mind moving back to my hometown *oh my* to hang out with my momma and Irmie (my granny). Life is SHORT and fam is all you got! When I go home to visit, me and my momma shut the thrift stores DOWN. We are a force to be reckoned with!

70. I like white choco lattes from Starbucks but I refuse to pay $4 when I can get bland coffee at work for free. I'm cheap.

71. My girlfriend asked me to be a mentor for teenage girls, like a Big Sis. I'm thinking to myself, I'd better not. What kind of role model am I? Geesh! Sometimes I'm jealous. Sometimes my attitude sucks. Most times I don't like people. Corporate America is bogus. College is dumb. I am bitter about my student loans. Nah, I better stay away from those girls.

72. I can not stop watching anything "bride" related. Bridezilla. Platinum Weddings. My Big Fat Fabulous Wedding. Whose Wedding Is It Anyway? *don't say 1 word*

73. I am NOT money hungry. I pride myself on this.

74. I am NOT a label-whore.

75. Hot sunny days make me smile. And sweat.

Have a safe, blessed, drama free weekend!

Durty

Lust of the Eye

In recent months, I can not for the life of me keep my eyes off older married men *sigh*. If anybody knows me then they know I have a soft spot for the youngins (no pun intended) lol. Times are a'changing. I can't pinpoint the particular day or special event when the bells started going off in my head but them bitches been ringin ever since!

Sidenote: I think Stunna knows about this blog and if what I'm saying is true honneyyyyy I'm busted!

It's bad enough that I'm looking salivating ova older folk but married??? No, not me! Yes.Me. I be so shamed cuz once I see the shining gold band my mind gets to wondering and imagining all types of crazy shit! No lie.

I saw this older brother (late 40's maybe) in a suit. My first thought? Sexiness personified. My second thought? I wonder what his wife looks like. Third thought? I'd like summa that! *shamed* Now see, I ain't the type to be spreading it all around that's sooo like middle '90s *lol*. And I seriously am not interested in having relations with anybody other than Stunna BUT that does not stop my mind from going there every chance it gets. Is this what happens when you're almost 35? If so, I ain't ready!

I mean am I really the only one with these impure thoughts? Y'all keep me prayed up before I go out here and act a dayum fool.

Durty

I Be Sluggin'

Formal definition: Slugging is a term used to describe a unique form of commuting found in the Washington, DC area sometimes referred to as "Instant Carpooling" or "Casual Carpooling". It's unique because people commuting into the city stop to pickup other passengers even though they are total strangers! However, slugging is a very organized system with its own set of rules, proper etiquette, and specific pickup and drop-off locations. It has thousands of vehicles at its disposal, moves thousands of commuters daily, and the best part, it’s FREE! Not only is it free, but it gets people to and from work faster than the typical bus, metro, or train. I think you'll find that it is the most efficient, cost-effective form of commuting in the nation.

For the most part I enjoy sluggin'. Sometimes I'm the driver, sometimes I'm one of the passengers. My incentive? The fact that it's free and it gets you where you need to go faster than the bus or the train. What I especially enjoy is the wide range of characters I see everyday! It cracks me up when I'm driving and I have two older white men with me in the car. Me, ethnic hair, big hoop earrings, R&B blowing out the speakers. Them, stiff suits, white starched shirts, striped tie, briefcase, newspaper. It's hilarious! I actually prefer to drive because I have more control that way. I hate getting in the car with folk who drive 1 mile over the speed limit holding up traffic or drive like a bat out of hell.

When I do ride, I like to get in the backseat. I'm not sure why but that's my m.o. Sometimes I'll get the drivers who want to talk (when I'm forced to get in the front) like this one lady who felt the need to tell me that she had ordered a fridge three weeks prior and it still hadn't arrived. Her, her husband and her daughter had to share a college dorm sized fridge and her husband was miserable. *blank stare*

Or the lady that had me in the back, a white older man in the front and she insisted on popping her dayum gum the entire time. I mean like sistergirl popping where you move the gum from one side of your mouth to the other to get more pop outta each chew. I wanted to smack her in the back of her dayum head. I was so embarrassed. And to make matters worse, she just HAD to talk on her bluetooth while driving. I mean that conversation couldn't wait until we got out the car? Did I have to know that she was going to Atlantic City for the weekend and had the babysitter all lined up? Why did she have to be one of us is all I kept saying? The stereotype is alive and well! Ugh! When it was time for me to get out of her car she asked who did my hair. I do my own hair hmpf. She asked if I did other folks I said nope with the quickness and got the hell up out her car. Her weave looked a dayum mess. I can't.

I often see the same folk.

Like this morning. I saw the lady (lady of color not sure of her ethnicity tho) that I rode with who had to tell us that she had bought her lil Dodge overseas cuz it was cheaper. She's military. She bought it so her daughter will have a car to use when she goes to college in two years. Oh and it's equipped with bluetooth and she let us know that it came with the car. As if anybody cared. Well she rode with me this morning and soon as she got in my car she asked if I'd had electrical problems with my car. Huh? Then she said she didn't know it was so roomy. What I wanted to say was you a dumbass for paying 20gs for that lil ass cramped Dodge when you couldda paid 12gs for a roomy Sonata. To prevent her from talking me to death I turned up the radio and kept my eyes on the road. Nobody feel like talking in the morning people!

Then there's the black guy in the blue car with the personalized plates. People still do that? Anyway. I've ridden with him a few times and each time he was blaring Ne-yo. I don't know why this bothered me? Couldda been the fact that not only was he blaring it but he was also singing along and knew all the words. Ne-yo? I'm just saying. He asked me if I had Ne-yo's cd *lol* and that he was feeling Tank's new one as well. I laid my head on the headrest and closed my eyes. That's why I hate sittin in the front seat! LOL!

I've ridden with a few white men and only one white women! The white men are usually young soldiers on their way to the pentagon in full army garb. It fascinates me cuz I'm wondering what do you do all day in your fatigues? Sit at a desk? I can't imagine it. I've heard stories of folks being over in Iraq and leading hundreds of men to people calling in sick although they ain't have enough time on the books. I've heard it all trust me and I absolutely love it.

Stunna always ask if I'm nervous about dealing with all these strangers and honestly I'm not. It's like I'm part of a carpool cult. You get in where you fit in and when you do you shut the hell up and ride. This is the life.

Would you ever slug if given the opportunity or would you be leary? Holla atchu girl.

Durty

Pieces of Me, Volume II

Click here to view Pieces of Me, Vol I

26. I hate seafood. I can't stomach the smell or that fishy taste. I can eat some fish but it's gotta be deep fried *lol* otherwise it's a no-go.

27. I'm searching for Maxwell's Embrya cd. When is he gonna come out with another album?

28. Haagen Daaz Pineapple Coconut ice cream. Heavenly! Nothing else needs to be said.

29. I don't have a favorite color but I'm digging turquoise blue right now.

30. Most of the stuff I talk about on here stems from a conversation with Stunna.

31. When I lived in my apt, I put the cable in my ex-husband's name and never paid the final bill. I feel bad about it but I ain't gonna pay it. *shrug*

32. I can not stand when men come up to me and say dumb shyt. "You know I will spoil you!" "Where yo man?" "Why you not smiling?" blah blah effin blah.

33. My son wants to drive my car. Ugggghhhhhh!!!!

34. I have the gift of goodbye. I thank God for this. I give you the deuce and I'm out. Period.
Ask my ex-husband in case you need references.

35. Saying ex-husband is so weird cuz I never got use to saying husband.

36. I met two of my closest friends on the internet back in 1998 and we are still friends. Wow.

37. Red meat gives me heartburn although I heart dubba cheeseburgers from McD's. Life ain't fair.

38. I hate lotioning up. I am ashy as hell under my jeans.

39. My cup(s) runneth over. It's ridayumdiculous. One tit is one size the other is a whole nother story. What gives?

40. I can never buy a suit (blazer & jacket/skirt). I got it from my momma...geesh!

41. I'm feeling real ethnic. I got the bohemian hair thing goin on so now all I wanna do is wear silver jewelry, listen to bob marley and take showers every other day. *shrug* don't know why but hey that's what I'm feeling.

42. I can't wait to visit Senegal. They are some of the prettiest people in the world!

43. I'm wondering why Adam wasn't born but Jesus was??? I'mma need some of you Bible scholars to hook me up with an answer. What is the significance?

44. I haven't been on birth control since 1991 and I have not gotten pregnant once. Wow.

45. I enjoy reading. I especially enjoy reading "white stuff" if you will. I mean don't get me wrong I love black romance but that Zane shyt kilt me. Have y'all seen her? I'll pass.

46. I can listen to Kelly Clarkson and Evanescense *sp* all day.

47. What is the purpose of diet pepsi max?

48. I wonder what I'll look like when I turn 50. I imagine I will look exactly as I do now. *wishful thinkin*

49. I can not stomach BET! Hell Date? Are you kidding me? Baldwin Hills? Yea ok!

50. I love him.

Open Book

Is this you? Is your life an open book? Do you tell the people closest to you everything that you may or may not have going on? Do you purposefully tell them every detail about everything or do you pick and chose what you tell whether it be consciously or subconsciously? Do you even take pause and think before you tell anybody anything no matter how close they are to you? Tell me what you do.

I think before I speak. I do this with every one. Even down to my bestest of bestest. She tells me everything (every detail) or at least I think she does and I enjoy that. But what I enjoy most is that she knows that I don't tell every detail (most time can't remember the time line or in what order shyt happened) and she's ok with that. She knows that I can tell a story in about three sentences. I am NOT a random talker. Nope, that's not me.

I don't know if I'd say I keep secrets or don't tell things because I'm being dishonest or disloyal or any of that. I guess my thing is if you tell everything, what do you have for yourself? If you share everything, what's left? Maybe it was a small piece of the story that I wanted to keep to myself moreso than me hiding it. Does that make sense? I'm a quiet person, some might even say I'm private. *shrug* I dunno, I guess that I am.

So what happens when the people closest to you question if you share everything with them? I mean am I suppose to? Because they're included in my circle means that they are entitled to know everything even when I'm at home laying on the couch wondering how it would feel to be BeYaki (beyonce for those of you who lack humor) for a day? *lol* I mean its random dumb stuff like that that I don't care to share with anybody because it's dumb and unimportant and means absolutely nothing. Am i entitled to share that? I'm just saying.

Just like this blog. Stunna has no idea I have it then he might be dick tracy and know everything about this blog . *shrug* I don't really care, honest I don't but I'm not going out my way to say hey Stun, I got a new blog, come read. Umm nope. Some things I just want to keep to myself. Can I have something just for me? That's all I'm asking.

Do y'all share everything with ya folks or do you keep some things under wraps just because?

Holla atcha girl..

Durty

He Almost Made Me Cuss

You ever met somebody that you honestly tried to like but after it was all said and done you realized that the shipped has sailed and ain't no way in God's name you'd ever consider yourself friends with them? I mean has that ever happened to you? Has someone ever made you reevaluate your entire shit because it took all of that and then some for you not to cuss they ass out? Seriously! When I said that I had to hold my mule this weekend, I mean I had to hold my dayum mule because it was about to be some slow singing flower bringing (ala Biggie circa 1990s) *lol*.

I try very hard not to lose my religion cuz to me folks ain't worth my place in line. I'm tryna get through the pearlies by any/all means necessary. It ain't worth my time or my dignity to tell you how much of an ass you are. I mean I could get some delight out of tellin you you really NOT hot and ya breath smelled like sour garbage but hey, I didn't go there cuz I'm not tryna put you out there like that. But then when folks try to play you and push you somewhere you not even trying to go, it really helps me realize that I do better when I'm by myself LOL!

Durty

Write the Vision, Make it Plain

Oftentimes we are quick to say what we don't want, can't do, won't do, ain't tryna do but I challenge us all to sit down and think about the things we want for ourselves, our families, our friends. Ya'll have heard me say this before, God says to write the vision and make it plain be specific in your requests! and that's just what I'm fit'na do.

I want:
(these are in no specific order and one does not "outrank" the other no matter how big or how small)

to have peace with the things that I can not control/change whether it be my body shape/type *lol* or the fact that time is flying by way too fast.

Stunna to find a job, move here, sell his house, propose, marry me, love me, knock me up.

to go to Las Vegas, in November and stay at the MGM grand.

to beat up my best friend's ex. I will introduce him to my five finger sermon and knock his ass out!

clarity in the things that are confusing to me.

study the Word more.

buy Mom Dukes a house cuz the one she's living in is gangsta leaning for sure. UGH!

live easy and not worry about bills or savings or anything that deals with financial stuff.

See how hard it is to sit down and write out what it is you want. All this crap I just typed seems simple but I promise I'll dig deeper and see what I come up with now it's your turn to write it and make it plain.

Holla at ya girl!

Fryed, Dyed, Laid to tha Sydeeee

One of my biggest pet peeves is when nigs feel it necessary to tell you what you can and can not do to your hair. That, my friends, is something I can.not.will.not tolerate.

Case in point:

Stunna, my current piece, knows better than to vocalize his opinions about my hair because he know that he know that he know I do whateva I want to MY hair. Although he does like this one particular style and I do (I must admit) try to accomodate him as much as possible he still knows the deal. I'm a chameleon when it comes to my do. Sorry, I just am. I had a natural for all of five minutes *lol* and I could tell that he wasn't overjoyed with it BUT he didn't overstep himself and say "I don't like that on you blah blah blah" cuz then I wouldda cut it ALL off and we wouldda been twins. Then what would he have said? Hmpf!

My ex-husband on the other hand HATED braids. So each opportunity I got, I braided my shyt out of spite. Yep sure did. Cuz I'm like how you gone tell me what to do with my hair? What part of the game is that? Get the fuk outta here. I'm how old? Yea, that's what I thought. *thuggish ruggish*

I get so tired of hearing "if I cut my hair, so and so will have a fit. He likes me with long hair!" It doesn't matter that yo azz look blah as hell with that long dead hair. Long hair and no style is not cute on any level. So ladies please stop the madness. For true! And if ya man loves long hair but you not capable of growing yours at the rate he'd like, please don't go get the long, flowy, hollywood barbie, yaki weave. Please don't. I'm begging you. Please.

So my real question is:

To the ladies, does ya S.O. really care what you do or don't do to your hair? Do they recognize/comment when you switch it up?

To the men, do you care what kinda style ya girl is rockin? And if you not feeling it, do you give your honest opinion and tell her that her shyt is ugly/ain't becoming/not attractive/etc.*lol*?

Holla atcha girl

Durty

National Night Out

It's 95 dayum degrees with a heat index of 100+ and it's National Night Out! If anybody thinkin bout doing some dumb shyt in this heat they ass need to be electrocuted. Period. That's my public service announcement! National Night deeessseeee *eye roll*

In case you were wondering. From Google: National Night Out evokes wholesome images of neighbors meeting police over hot dogs and soda pop in the name of fighting crime.

Ummm?? Ok! It's too effin hot to meet anybody and eat anything but for the good of the community I'll mozy on over and grab a dog and diet coke.

Stay cool people! Stay Cool!

Pieces of Me, Volume I

Don't know why I feel like sharing and not that you care but here goes *shrug*:

1. I'd rather walk for an hour in the hot ass sun than drink the recommended 6-8 glasses of water a day.

2. My old blog page was deleted (still don't know why or by whom). My boyfriend doesn't know about this page. Not sure why I'm keeping it a secret.

3. I want to try my hand (head) at dreads but I don't want to go through such a permanent process. I'll just rock the fake ones and see how it feels.

4. My first marriage was a joke although at the time I was like "Why not? Might as well, hmpf!" Nobody will ever understand my logic on THAT one. That's for dayum sure.

5. I'm 33 but feel like life is almost over. I'm not sure what that's all about but at times I am so freaking morbid.

6. I'm obsessed with what happens between life and death. Are you just stuck in limbo praying that you go up and not down??? No, seriously, I wonder.

7. Although long distance relationships suck, I feel more at ease after I've spent time with him. That feeling will last about two days before I'm ranting and raving again about not being able to see him when I want. It got me going in circles... dah dah dah.. round and round I go... be glad when this shyt stops.

8. I tivo TD Jakes every morning. TBN. 7:00. My favorite sermon is "Dying Places".

9. I don't know what I'd do all day at work if it weren't for my fellow bloggers???!!???\

10. I watch The Hills on MTV. New season starts on Monday. Can't wait. I used to watch Dawson's Creek and Felicity back in the day. Great TV.

11. I am so loving that song by Justin Timberlake. I can't think of the name of it but it is fantabulous. It takes me back to the golden days when there were good R&B songs that got you in the mood.

12. I fukin hate Making The Band 4. I got sucked into it this season cuz a cat from my hometown was on there. He got cut and I lost interest. And ALL them dudes ugly including Diddy, so....

13. I saw Lil Richard, Al Green and BB King over the weekend. The concert was great although it was long as hell and Al Green was high. I'd put money on it!

14. I developed allergies/sinuses like last year. How does that just up and happen? Huh? I've been suffering ever since. It's some bullshyt.

15. I'm going to San Fran this weekend. The freaking high will be 65 dayum degrees!?!! It's 100 here in DC today. WTF? How do I possibly pack for that?

16. I want to go see the comedian Earthquake in Miami in Sept. Can anybody put five on that for me? Dayum.

17. Most days I get to work and the first thing out my mouth is, why the fuk am I here? I usually have zero work to do. Zero!

18. I am blessed beyond measure. (see #17 *lol*)

19. Sometimes I think about how I'd be as a celebrity but that does not last too long. There is no way I could be on that type of schedule. I am lazy as hell. Period. Nope, couldn't do it even if the money right.

20. I want to travel to Prague and Greece and Columbia and unheard of places. But who's gonna go with me? I'd travel so much more if I didn't have to coordinate with other folk's schedules. I wanna go when I wanna go! Ugh!

21. Sometimes I wonder how life would be if I was some one totally different.

22. I am so feeling Chrisette Michelle's cd. She is in heavy rotation!

23. I use to be a movie whore. Now, not so much.

24. The summer is almost over and I'm sad. This is my type of weather!

25. I think men and women can be 100% platonic but it's usually up to the woman if that will be the case.

Dear God, It's Me.... Durty

God, I know that You have a wonderful plan and purpose for me. I want to be in "right standing" with You today. Show me your ways and teach me to walk righteously before You. Shine your light in my heart and give me strength and wisdom to pursue the path You have in-store for me. In Jesus' Name. Amen.

My Dogs Be Barkin!

I can't pinpoint the exact day or time when my feet officially said "eff you"! I use to rock high heels, like ALL THE TIME. Now, my feet are not having it! I might can do one or two hours but after that my feet start hollerin Bytch Please! Loud! Nothing is worse than thinkin you cute with ya feet throbbin! Cuz it definitely shows on ya face. Not a good look.

For the past two summers, flip flops and flats have been my closest allies. I have a closet fulla shoes but I refuse to be tippin round DC with my feet hurtin. And you know DC sidewalks are some shyt. They will scar the shyt out your heels (the cracks use to always get me for some reason??!?? *shrug*) I have no idea what I'd wear to da club, God forbid I ever decide to go. Standin round tryna look cute is soooo summer 2005. I can't and I won't. If my outfit can't be cute with my flip flops or flats then *sigh* I don't know what to tell you. Sue me. It's all about comfort now baby! You best believe. I'm already short as hell so I really need heels to give me some height but I refuse to sacrifice my feet just so I can appear to be taller. What? Nope.

I see women on the train all the time in their Sunday's best shoes and all. Where are they goin? It definitely could not be me! I remember I was on the train and a dude tried to holler. First thang out his mouth was "hey, where you on your way to?" I was like huh? work idiot! LOL!!! I keep it gangsta with jeans, tshirt and flip flops/flats. Thank gawd for relaxed dress codes! Geesh!

And if I'mma be completely honest, some of the flats hurt my feet too. *shrug* Either they too tight across the front or they squeeze my baby toe and that's definitely a no go! So I'll just stick with my Old Navy flip flops (they come in every color and they are $2.99) *lol* and rock 'em til my feet be like you givin me grief yo! Then I'll walk around in house shoes cuz I am so not tryna impress anybody walking round with broke down feet!*lol*

Holla atchu girl...

Durty